Nick: Dry Trails

Justin is lost. Hopelessly. He died a few minutes ago, and through his innate sense of misdirection got himself lost.

In the middle of the desert.

In the middle of the night.

With monsters all around.

In every. Single. Direction.

Naturally, my self-absorbed sense of bravado and heroism kicks in, and I boastfully claim that not only would I find him, but I would bring him back to our house safely.

I know where he is... sort of. Only a couple hundred blocks from the homestead. Surely this wouldn't pose a problem for a manly man of my manly convictions.

So, I scurry off with sword in hand and smugness in tow. I ask Justin to describe his surroundings.

"Um. Cacti."

"Can you... give me anything else?"

"No, not really. How about we just meet up at the top of the tallest part of the desert?"

This seems like a good plan. I scan the horizon and quickly find a very large dune, and climb up it. I do not see Justin. A brilliant idea dawns on me. I'll make a huge dirt tower, and line it with torches. He won't be able to miss it, unless something weird happens or -

"...dude, I'm dead. I'm back at the spawn point."

Damn. Oh well. Now to get back... down... from this...

Damn.

How do I get down from here, again? No big deal. I'll just wait for daybreak, and then dig down. All the monsters will be dead by then. Besides, it's pretty nice from up here.



Day comes, and I decide to take a peek down at the bottom of the OH MY LORD SHIT FUCK IN HEAVEN



Of course, during the design of my master plan, I neglected to remember that Creepers and Spiders don't die during the day. They have some sort of genetic immunity to sunlight, one that makes them illogically immune to the solar radiation. THAT MAKES NO SENSE, THEY ARE MONSTERS, SUNLIGHT SHOULD KILL THEM, EVERYONE WHO'S ANYONE KNOWS THAT.

I sit here, cursing the creator of the game and my stupid stupidness as every daylight-loving monster in the entire 70,000 kilometer desert has stumbled over to my position in curiosity and probable hunger for flesh.

Wait! I forgot! I have a bow and arrow! That will do the trick!

My fifteen arrows are only able to pick off two Creepers. In addition to their sun invincibility and their ability to explode on command, they apparently have skin made of titanium alloy or something. In other words, they are nature's perfect killing machine.

Ok, Nick. You know what you have to do.

I jump. I hear gruesome hissing and explosions. The bottom of the tower is destroyed, but I am still alive... barely.

I make it to the house. Night is breaking already. Matt calls out to me:

"OH MY GOD I'M LOST, SOMEONE FIND ME."